Fucking Horny Blog

I was reading an article the other day about how some whacked out religous morality right wing nut-jobs go criticising Disney movies with a bunch of bullshit about how the Disney artists are perverts and intentionally make temples and towers phallus shaped…(yeah, like it’s their fault that an arabic tower has the shape it does)

I wonder what those same groups of nut-jobs would say about this almost Disneyesque art and if they would catch the Phallic Symbolism thrusting in front of them or if it could be used on these censorship review boards to entice some heart attacks and get rid of those censorship motherfuckers.

This is where the line gets drawn and smart, savvy parents know that it’s time to worry and maybe make an impromptu trip to the Ivy League college to say hello to Sweet Suzie before she becomes Slut Suzie…

Parents: No matter how much it might piss you off and exasperate you for your 18 year old daughter at college to be asking for money every time you talk to her….it’s when they say they suddenly end up financially stable and not asking for money at that age that you have to worry.

Sometimes I read these and wonder what the hell the narrator of these jokes and sight-gags has as his major mental problem that makes him so incapable of realizing what makes  a good thing and what makes a bad thing…

Frank has no problem with his job….yeah right buddy…Frank has absolutely no problem with the fact that those bitches made him a fucking eunuch so that they wouldn’t have to worry about his being distracted leading to a car accident or having any pleasure himself. Let’s chop off your fucking genitals and see how much of a problem you have with it Mr. fucking narrator.

Ahhh yes the new way to film porn developed by those stoned teens that were getting all wigged out looking in the rear-view mirror one day when they were driving around blasted out of their skulls..

The avant-garde style of taking the whole idea of objects being closer than they appear in the rearview mirror of your car and applying it to photography in porn making

People never think of the consequences of their actions nowadays…they just go along living for the moment.

If this guy really wanted to get ahead in his quest for sexual fullfilment without breaking his vows, he should have just killed the old battle-axe bitch version of his wife before going back…then as each one aged he could have just repeated the process forever with versions a minute younger than the first one he went back for

Halloween is all over the stores right now and has been for a while, and pretty damn soon we’ll be seeing everything there is to see about Christmas.

So I decided to emulate the stores and bring in a little holiday cheer…but of course given that it’s not actually the holiday season I chose something with a twist (and some teeth), cos godammit those bitches who NEVER suck cock or NEVER swallow just totally deserve to be put on Santa’s Naughty list and not get any presents.

Now as long as education has been co-ed there have been highschool and college students getting it on with each other and exploring each other’s bodies…in my day a favorite spot for everyone was behind the bleachers on the sports fields.

Nowadays sex is everywhere, people can’t surf the internet without some naked chick popping up and it’s made it so today’s youth has far less inhibitions…they still use the bleachers to play around…difference is they don’t care if they are behind or in front now.

This cartoon reminds me of an old joke about an ant and an elephant….

Once upon a time there was a horny ant at the zoo who came upon an elephant…now the ant climbed up the elephant and started fucking it…of course an elephant being an elephant and an ant being an ant the elephant didn’t really feel anything.  Suddenly a coconut fell from a tree above the elephant and hit him on the head.  “OW”, said the elephant.  Filled with delusions of his own masculine grandeur the ant of course thought it was him making the elephant say ow and responded, “yeah…that’s right…take it bitch.”

Too many women have some fucked up ideas in their heads as though they are meant to be doing or should be doing or want to be doing real jobs like men and have the same rights to vote and so on and so on…they just never freakin stop…

Now THIS is what a woman should be, someone who knows that even though they aren’t equal to men in many ways…they are far more than equal when it comes to sex and a real woman enjoys the fact that sexual satisfaction is the real reason that they exist and they have as many orgasms as they can while getting off as many guys as are around.

While some people are arrogant assholes and bitches who think that their farts don’t stink and that they walk above everyone else, other people sell themselves totally short when it comes to their own personal value…don’t know why…it’s just the way it is.

Take this slut here….she just gave this guy a sweet blowjob, sucked down his cum and now she hopes it will get him to show her a camera which if she buys he gets a commision on…damn bitch, just demand the fucking camera in return for the blowjob.

Exactly dude….who the hell cares about the damn door…no matter how freaky it is.  You guys are naked for a reason and it isn’t to check out the fucking architecture…it’s to fuck.

That’s just one of the problems with chicks…they spend so much time looking at the small things going on and ignore the big fun things that are right in front of them…well, fuck him bitch.

Time for a quick test to see how with it you are sexually…take a very fast look at this picture, then close your eyes and say what is missing…

That’s right….the slut has her mouth wide open and is missing the third cock to fill it up and jam her with each opening stuffed…if you saw it right away then kudos to you.  You should be gangbanging some slut instead of reading a blog

Yknow, this dwarf dude in the green with the huge baseball bat for a cock should slap that purple beret’d dwarf around his head.

From the looks of him he’s got one line he can use on the ladies to impress them and maybe make them laugh, but along comes this little punk who just has to ‘explain’ the joke to the hot babes…nothing worse than a killjoy who can’t keep his mouth shut when you’re getting some sweet pussy action.

If you went to any small town settler museums over the summer and had one of their tours you probably heard about how among the many other hardships encountered by these early settlers, one common one was a sense of isolated boredom at times.

Thankfully some of the friendlier native tribes had open liberated women who took white settler women like this and showed them the pleasure they could get from beading…which of course led to a lot of the reason that trading for beads became so popular in the early 18th and early 19th century.

Poor Fred Finklestien is finally caught out….

All these years he has been impressing women by showing them that while he is not the strongest, or beefiest, or most handsome of men available he does have a big package that pleases…now we see that he was nothing but a stuffed sheepskin.